Jubilee!

Hey all you classy people!

Welcome back from the break and from your tryptophan coma! Here's a tip: avoid mirrors and buffets for the next week or two, or at least long enough to lose the five pounds you've gained. Thank you, Jesus, for elastic waistbands. . . .

Just in case you went deaf and blind over the break, or simply weren't paying attention at the end of chapel, today is His Holiness' birthday. So, happy birthday Mr. Strawn! Here's hoping the next 365.25 days of your life are everything but mediocre.

So, it's officially December. Time to get out all those tacky icicle lights, popcorn garlands, and blow-up Santas [. . . .] and participate in the cultural disaster that Christmas has become. Call me Scrooge if you must, but there's something a little ironic about the insistence of the Christian religion to celebrate the birth of its Savior on a pagan holiday.

It was nice to return to a band that didn't suck. Nothing revolutionary, but at least my ears weren't bleeding.

All rise for the REVEREND Stepanie Higgins. [I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal.]

We get it, you're happy to be here.

Oh, and I need to take a moment to give a shout out to Chris Holcomb. Holla! Where are you? What?! You're on the back row?! You mean you don't like chapel either and sit on the back row so that you can talk to your friends and not pay attention? Just like most of the other people at SNU? And you'd prefer that I not call you out in front of the whole school and make an ass of myself at your expense? Damn, that's a surprise.

Also, I'm gonna spend about five minutes talking nonsense while I try in vain to connect the Hebrew celebration of Jubilee with a library fine that I really don't want to pay. [Here's an idea: how about a year of Jubilee with regards to chapel? A year of no chapels! You know, as long as we're in the business of setting people free from bondage. . . .]

Here's five more minutes worth of random shit spewing from my mouth.

Ha! You thought I was actually going to start my sermon now, didn't you? But you're wrong! Now I'm going to tell you about how I might, at any moment, begin panting. [Stephanie, I know you're preaching and being filled by the Holy Spirit and everything, but I don't think God is in the market for another holy mother.]

Once she finally did get started, Stephanie had some good things to say. If you were in chapel last Tuesday, when we sat down with the Good Reverend for storytime, you'll know that Stephanie's points were very similar to the ones he made.

Last week Jason asked the question, "How well do you ever really know anybody?" His point was that, often, our default relational setting is one of seclusion and secrecy, and while the practice of really digging into people to find out who they are and what stories they have to tell is difficult to establish, it is well worth the effort.

Stephanie continued in this vein by encouraging us to simply love people. Regardless of appearance, or movie preference, or the fact that they are roughly three times your age and can still kick your ass in marathons, to simply love them.

Now, obviously this "love" for others will not take the form of romantic or familial love. So what does this "love" look like? Well, [brace yourselves, I'm about to quote scripture again] for all of his shortcomings, I think Paul actually did a decent job of summarizing Jesus' attitude of love in his letter to the Corinthians. [13: 4-7]

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

In most cases this passage is referenced when a pastor is talking about how spouses ought to relate to one another, but its application seems much broader to me.

I think it goes without saying that such a practice is bound to be difficult. As Americans we're taught to look out for ourselves and to take what we can get, regardless of the cost to others. And I don't think Jesus, or Paul [St., apparently], meant for us to run our love up flagpoles for everyone to see. There's a line from a Jars of Clay song that reads, "Peace is not the heroin that shouts above the cost." [The song is called, "Surprise."] And I think this love may be a little bit like that, subtle, but you'd notice its absence.

Class chapels tomorrow. Fuck.

You stay classy San Diego.

"Keep near me and you will be safe."

I'm Daedalus?

Assume the missionary position . . .

Welcome to Chapel! It's almost Christmas!

Gee Brad, I know chapel is a product you're selling, but I never thought you would take it so far as to begin operating on the retail calendar.

Hooray for Ethos Groups. Seriously, great idea. It's always good to see Christians get off their pew-hardened asses and actually do something that puts their faith into action. Oh, and I've decided to start a betting pool. $5 buy in, taking bets on what the average membership in the Ethos Groups will be. If SNU holds to its historical standards, each group should see a turnout of about five to ten people. [Three cheers for apathy!] And they're off!

Hooray for a tiny change in the "worship" experience!

I'm glad to see that even without Drew's prompting, the ladies remembered to echo at the end of the first song all by themselves. Pat yourselves on the back for remembering your years of training.

Elizabeth Chrisman graced the stage for the first time today. [Way to pop that cherry.] It's a shame she had to play with the Maldonator. His hyper-affected voice completely drowned out her violin. Here's a thought, Jairo - why don't you tone it down a bit and let a legitimate musician shine for once? When we could hear her [such as in the beginning of the second song] she sounded beautiful - wish we could have had more of that.

Speaking of the wonders of the second song, [which sounded an awful lot like a Jonas Brothers ballad - I'm surprised girls weren't throwing their panties onstage for Jesus] Jairo busted out his siren for that one. At first I thought it might be a police raid, then I realized it was just the man himself on stage. There were some moments where our man looked as if he was suffering from a case of Johnmayerstagefacitosis. [See fig. 1.]

Fig. 1


It's a shame he wasn't suffering from John Mayer voice. Lord knows we were suffering from Jairo's.

At this point I'd like to give a shout-out to all my peeps in the Mez. It's good to know that someone has finally recognized the spiritual superiority of the people who sit in the Mezzanine. They've been the holiest among us all along, but now their secret's out. I know where I'll be sitting tomorrow...

It's always interesting to listen to missionaries speak in church. Why? Well, for one, they always tell stories, and are always very excited about the stories they tell. This is not terribly interesting within itself, but it becomes so when one realizes how few people are actually paying attention to what they are saying, and how the few audience members that are listening are not nearly as excited to hear the story as the missionaries are to tell it. Oh well, I guess that comes with being an evangelical American. [Answer Mia's question for me: "Do you listen, or do you wait to speak?"]

It is my unfortunate pleasure to report to you at this time that, despite my best efforts, I have been foiled. It was, and still is, the purpose of this blog to try and provide meaningful reflection and challenging commentary regarding the goings on in chapel. However, after two weeks of exciting blog posts, facebook debate, and IM conversations, His Holiness the Strawn seems to have uncovered my Achilles heel. If the purpose of my efforts is to enrich the intellectual lives of the student population by commenting on chapel services and challenging some of the views and positions presented therein, then it follows that I need something to comment on. However, His Holiness has discovered this and has thwarted any and all attempts to have this blog become anything beyond a gleaming beacon of satire by removing from chapel all subjects of substance, educational value, or student interest. Touché, o enlightened one. But I'm not worried, I'll get you yet! And your little dog too!

Here's to hoping something tomorrow presents me, and all of you, with something worth discussing.

"Keep near me and you will be safe."

Daedalus