Chapel Talk, with Brad Strawn. But first, a brief word from our sponsors . . .

Please welcome to chapel Nancy Rizkalla. But before we get to that, a brief commercial break.

All of you non-Christians out there listen up! We have a new and exciting opportunity for you! For a limited time only we will be offering a seminar exploring the Christian faith! Don't miss out!

. . . .I'm fairly positive that any atheists or agnostics attending SNU came to the school as Christians, thought very critically about Christianity and the Church, and decided they didn't want any part of it. And for any students who are adherents to another faith system, this comes off as little more than a poorly disguised conversion class. Second betting pool: how many students will attend this ethos group? $5 buy in. My bet is on zero.

Greetings also to Asbury Lane. Don't be confused students, I know Brad introduced them as SNU's jazz combo - he likes to pretend he controls things that don't belong to him - but they owe no allegiance to the university outside of their being students. They sounded fabulous, as always.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, an interview with Nancy Rizkalla.

Grandmother Rizkalla: "Don't doubt your faith - we paid for it." Hilarious. Remember that super convincing argument from the other day?

Nancy: "I was a Christian for a week after church-camp." Weren't we all? [Of course, after a week of being ostricized we realized that living with your faith on your sleeve really isn't as appealing as they make it out to be at Jesus Camp.]

It was good to hear someone openly discuss growing in the Christian community, and do so while being very frank about their doubts. It really is quite refreshing to hear someone say, "I did not want to be a Christian," and then have them relate why they chose to believe outside of the fact that their family always has. Though, to be fair, I hardly think that spending four days as a Buddhist [what?] or almost considering atheism one time constitutes a life frought with doubt.

Let's take a small commercial break. Eco-Superheroes? Have you joined? Please, students, do your part and walk your paper over the the campus' sole recycling bin. [What recycling bin you ask? Oh, that's right, you wouldn't know because it has been hidden behind the fine arts building beside Snowbarger Hall, well out of sight and out of mind. Good job with the going green thing. . . .]

We now return to our regularly scheduled program.

I especially liked her comments on the Church's mission work. "It worries me when churches hand out Bibles in developing countries but fail to alleviate their poverty." Here you go, read this and everything will be alright. Health will fall down like manna from Heaven.

Another of my favorite things that many groups, including Christians, do when presented with a poverty situation is to throw money at the disenfranchised but refuse to invest any further in the search for a solution to the problem. Here's some news for you: throwing money at the problem doesn't fix anything. The only measure of relief that has a track record of lasting impact on poverty situations is education. No, not Bible school. I'm talking about math, science, literacy, and social skills. Sub-Saharan Africa, to take one example, does not need you to sponsor a child through Compassion International. What they need is for you to go build a school or go teach a sex-ed class for teenagers. If Christians actually took their scriptures seriously, this woudn't seem like such an outrageous suggestion. [Of course, I know I'm preaching to the choir here. It's obvious that everyone at SNU would gladly spend the first several years of their post-graduate lives working with HIV+ children in Africa.]

At the beginning of the third interview segment His Holiness said that it was "time for an Oprah moment and tears." First, Brad, the audience would have to be emotionally invested in the subject in order to tear up. Second, I am well aware of your jedi mind powers, but you will never be as formidable as Oprah.

One last thing. Nancy was not wrong to, as a young teenager, judge Christianity based on the people it produces. I think most of us would agree that Christians give themselves a bad rap much of the time. "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians, your Christians are so unlike your Christ." [That's the Mahatma himself.] Of course, if we were really going to follow our Christ, we would not be at a Christian school, walled off from the rest of the world and insulated from any and all attacks on our faith. If Jesus came back today, something tells me he would find institutions such as ours detestible in every way.

Discussion board. What are the pros of having religious universities? Cons?

Discuss.

Apologies Matt Damon, we're out of time.

"Keep near me and you will be safe."

Daedalus